Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Respect
The second was Sandy's posting about grumpy old men (and women). She, correctly in my opinion, identified a problem that we have as a group of professionals. Namely that we are percieved as being old-fashioned, closed-minded and stroppy. Mogens has jokingly described the Oak Table as being a club for such individuals, it wouldn't be much of a joke if there wasn't some truth to it.
In response to my contribution to the first list I got a response that quoted the old adage respect has to be earned. Sandy's posting generated a small discussion on Eddie's blog in which a comment was made about people from two different mindsets not respecting each other, and correctly in my view stating this was a mindset problem and not a role issue - though one might argue that some mindsets suit some roles well.
My position is this. The adage respect has to be earned is entirely false, at least in the professional arena. I'd replace it with this. respect once lost is very difficult to regain. Everyone is entitled to respect when you first engage, discuss and so on. Everyone - no matter how daft the question or their position may appear to be. It may be however that over time the same individual shows no appetite for learning, little understanding of argument (as opposed to debate) and limited thinking. Then, and only then, they are in danger of losing my respect.
I think we are confusing Respect (To feel or show deferential regard for; esteem.) which I believe does have to be earned especially in the professional arena - with courtesy (Polite behavior) which doesn't have to be earned but should always be our starting mode when engaging/discussing.
Chris